parody revision

Well That’s Nice

When my girlfriend says “Well that’s nice”, she could mean any of the following:
A) I genuinely think that’s nice
B) I am not actually listening, however I am providing some form of verbal acknowledgement so that you think I am listening.
C) I don’t care
D) If it makes you happy I’ll tag along and act happy for you

You can imagine the sheer frustration I feel when I share a piece of exciting news with my girlfriend and receive the usual response; “Well that’s nice”. I have heard that saying so many times that I have come to terms with the fact that when she recites that phrase, it is time for me to change the subject. “ I got the turbo charger on my motor last night!!” “Oh, well that’s nice.” And when the inquiries seize to halt, I have realized she could care less about my turbo charger, or flux capacitor, or turbine combustors. Etc, etc. And I realize that I should talk about things that she can feel enthusiastic about, but I feel the mere fact that I get excited about it should make her somewhat happy. At least she could act like it. Its not exactly like I could give two shits about the fabric store running out of the only “lavender” thread. However, knowing that it is something that she is passionate about, I will gladly talk to here about it with enthusiasm. Of course, the tone in which it is said, as well as her body language has everything to do with what in means in that context. I simply look deep, deep into her eyes and decipher the true message she is trying to communicate.


The original poem communicated that a particular phrase can mean a variety of things, depending on different variables. Yes does not always mean yes. I took that general idea and applied it to my life. “Well that’s nice” has taken on a new meaning for me. Instead of thinking that she believes what I told her is “nice”, I have learned that “Well that’s nice” means “cool, I don’t really care, but congratulations.” Both the original author and I provide a short list in the beginning showing what various possible meanings for the phrase at hand could mean. We then go into further detail about the phrase, and it’s misuse.